Dallas Nights

Last night I watched DALLAS SWAT - one of those reality shows where they follow a SWAT team around through different missions. I decided something last night. I want - no need - to move to Dallas and become a drug dealer. When the Swat team busts through my door, I'll shove all the drugs down my pants and demand to be strip searched. Curiously, one of the houses they busted last night had a "man trap" in it. I'm not sure what that is exactly, but I think I'll need one of those too.

On another note, during the show they aired a commercial for HP laptops. They came with a service and support warranty for the lifetime of the computer. I'm not sure what that means either, but I think it goes something like this:

Hello, HP tech support. How can I help you?

Hi there, my laptop just died and it won't turn on anymore. I need it fixed.

I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid I can't help you. Your warranty is no longer valid.

What do mean? I was told it had a lifetime warranty.

Yes it does sir, and your laptop has reached the end of it's life. Therefore the warranty is no longer valid.

But...

Thank you. (click)